Bathroom misadventures

So, for the last 12 years I have entered bathrooms with caution.

What if my brakes fail?

What if the toilet moves on me?

What if my chair slides while transferring?

What if?

What if?

Well, it’s always been a SILLY what if. It’s never happened. It was never GOING to happen.

Well.

It finally did.

We were at a very well known Austin original. I will not name names…THIS time, but if it happens again (I plan to go back JUST to test this)you can bet your bottom dollar I will tell you exactly where on Barton Springs Road they are.

This is a hint. If you live in Austin you may be able to guess where I was.

 

We finished our meal and I had a huge glass of water, so, well.. you know.

I had to pee.

I think.

I assume I did, so I went anyways.

I enter the bathroom and “what if” enters my head. I lock the deadbolt that is the only lock.

I almost leave my phone on the little ledge but WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF keeps playing in my head.

I put my phone in my purse, instead. My purse is on the back of chair, so I should be able to get to it.

I transfer and my chair scoots. Just a little.

I finish up and get ready to scoot back into my chair and I can’t. It moves. I try it another way. It still moves.

Well, crap.

I try something else and NADA. I’m stuck.

I call my husband and he doesn’t answer.

I call him again and it goes to voicemail.

He beeps in. I answer.

I tell him I’m stuck and nothing I try works.

I even tried putting my wallet behind the wheels. It slid the other way.

I hear him outside the door. He told Will to stand there and keep Lucas out of the way (or something like that).

He says there is no way to unlock from the outside that he can see.

Well, at this point they are going to have to break down the door or call the fire department because I was either going to be stuck on the toilet or on the floor.

He realizes he can jimmy his key in the little hole and turn it. Sorta.

The little old lady waiting informs him that there is someone in there.

He knows. It’s his wife and she’s in trouble.

Jimmy a little more. Key breaks but he opens it.

He holds my chair and I get in in.

He realizes how slippery the floor is too. He doesn’t fall but he holds the sink and slides on purpose to test it. Its’ REALLY slippery.

Safe.

I come out.

Where’s the baby?

Oh, crap.

He left him at our table.

Our waitress was waiting.

At first she thought we forgot him but the hostess said he was helping me.

We talk to a manager and she says she’s so sorry and she will have someone clean it.

We tell her it’s actually VERY clean, just slippery.

She’ll have them clean it anyways.

She will have HER boss call me and she hopes we have a great day.

S/He hasn’t.

It’s been over a week.


Comments

  1. says

    This is a part of being paralysed that people do not think about – we have to manage risks and have the courage to face them every single day….glad you got out OK!
    Ali

  2. Amber says

    I’m with the others. You should name names on this. Wow. I’m glad your husband was there to help and that you didn’t get hurt.

  3. says

    Get your husband a Swiss Army knife. I recommend the Swiss Champ model. While you’re at it, get one for yourself. I got them for my wife and daughters and they use them all the time, in amazing ways. I can’t remember jimmying a lock with mine, but it would probably do just fine.

    Happy holidays!
    Al Past´s last blog post ..So you don’t like science fiction?

      • says

        Ah. Well, I have a little scabbard for mine, which I keep on my belt. Always. It’s second nature to grab for it when I encounter a screen door latch with loose Phillips screws, for example. My wife and daughters generally carry theirs with their various accessories, as you might expect. Scissors! I use those several times a day! Nail file! Tweezers!
        Al Past´s last blog post ..So you don’t like science fiction?

  4. Anna says

    See? Your WHAT IF philosophy helped you out! You decided to take your cell phone with you, and it saved you! :) Clever. I am a WHAT IF person and I let everyone laugh at me with a smile on my face: “You’ll see once, that I was so right being too careful all the time!”.
    Anna´s last blog post ..root canal treatment cost

  5. says

    I’m not going to lie… at first it wasn’t funny… but because you can laugh, it made me giggle. I get this image of it all going on. I know if it were me there would probably be some obscenities uttered. I can’t believe no one has called you back! As someone in the management field, the first rule is always follow up with incidents such as this!! Glad you are okay and your hubby came to the rescue!

  6. olivia34newton says

    it’s funny at first, but then it’s really scary. glad your hubby came. i never been into that situation before. careful next time :)
    olivia34newton´s last blog post ..1300 numbers

  7. says

    I had a similar experience in a Melting Pot restaurant in DC. The bathroom was so incredibly tiny & my chair got wedged just so. And of *course* I had left my mobile sitting on the table. I was in there for what seemed like forever before I was finally able to crash & bang my way out, no doubt damaging the walls in the process. I was in tears by the time I got out though, and the manager was so very apologetic, that they didn’t care about that in the least.

    It’s things like this that people really don’t think about….
    Shari@Rain into Rainbows´s last blog post ..Target FAIL

  8. Carole J. Ortiz says

    huh! that was scary! Some restaurant have a bad toilet for someone that have some handicap I hope businessman will read this and think of some ways to help our friends.
    Carole J. Ortiz´s last blog post ..Chromagen

  9. says

    How awful! When I was in journalism school, I had to take a class that was based on learning how to write from the perspective of minorities, and other typically misrepresented people in our society. One of our assignments was to go to a mall and spend a some time in a wheelchair. I was amazed at how many people walked in front of me, ignored me, and how hard it was to maneuver around in many stores. The bathroom, though, was the worst! I had to wait to get into the wheelchair stall and then the lady didn’t even apologize for using it. And even though it was large, it was still hard to maneuver around inside. I can totally understand why public restrooms freak you out.
    Martha aka Momsoap´s last blog post ..Still No Black Babies on Local Shelves

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